Realization people!
I've been sharing the crux of why I felt it was so important to start this blog--- setting a background if you will. I just realized, I've never really invited you to truly speak to share what you know, your perspective on the topic. I know its scary posting something--- my stomach turned upside down the day I first pressed post. But it feels liberating...I swear. So ladies attach a comment here giving your thoughts and ideas.
I welcome anything you have to say. Positive or negative.
I welcome your experiences.
I will work on being concise.
I will smile more often on the page.:)
So here's a question for you: Have you ever experienced infertility? or worried about infertility?
5 comments:
PS: I just did my check-in with Curves. I've lost a total of twenty inches since June. So why don't I feel it? I will get under the 169 mark!!!
My hisband and I are wanting to try for our second but that 35th birthday is looming on my horizon this year and I am worried. My doctor spoke out of both sides of her mouth when she told me that statitics say the chances of problems will go up, but that I seemed healthy. Don't worry... she says. Three months after that conversation, my borther's friend and his wife gave birth to a Down's syndrome baby. The birth mother was only 25. I am rally scared to try again!!
Stacy,
While I feel confident you are a healthy vibrant woman, I can't stand when people say don't worry. So I won't say that to you.
Many women have healthy children after the age of thirty-five, in fact The Today show just featured a story on how more and more women are waiting until their thirties to have children.More and more women are determining the benefits outweigh the risks.
I read this article on pregnancy after 35. The best piece of advice I thought I'd share: when doctors discuss the risks and complications they are providing information based on a wide scope of people-- you, and your individual health and needs, are only a small portion of that scope.
http://www.wrtl.org/sexandpregnancy/havingahealthybabyafter35.aspx
Here's some info on Down's:
"Approximately 1 in 1,400 babies born from women in their 20's have Down syndrome; it increases to about 1 in 100 babies born with Down syndrome from women in their 40s" (webmd). You're not 40, so the risk is less.
Here's a brief article to peruse:http://www.askdrsears.com
HAVING A BABY AFTER AGE 35
If you have delayed pregnancy for any reason and are 35 or over, you may wonder if it is safe for older women to get pregnant. Statistically, women over 35 have slightly increased chance of having medical complications during pregnancy—then, again, so do teenagers. Research has shown that older mothers are more likely to miscarry, develop high blood pressure and gestational diabetes (gestational glucose intolerance), and have difficult deliveries.
But don't worry. Newer research shows that older mothers are more physically fit than they were a decade or two ago. While the negative statistics you hear may have been true for your mother, they certainly are not valid today! In fact, in the past twenty years, the number of women over age 35 who have given birth has more than doubled.
Many older women successfully give birth to healthy babies and also have maturity to raise children. Older mothers usually make wiser choices in self- care, ask more insightful questions during doctor-interviews, and assemble a strong birth team because of "doing their homework."
The bottom line? With today's advances in obstetrical care, women over 35 should no longer be frightened of having first babies. The risk decreases even more when women over 35 have second babies. If you are contemplating having a baby, don't let maternal age stand in your way.
Overall, I wish you the best as you ponder this decision for you and your family.
I had a miscarriage at age 38. It was caused by an infection which was caused by the amniocentesis (which showed the baby was perfect). We named him and I ended up with his ashes in a box. I had never urgently wanted children, but it was still completely wrenching (and while it is not tearing me up to this day. I still think of it often.) He would have been 18 this year. I think about it when I help out my elderly mother, whom I don't even much like, and realize now one is going to have any obligation or desire to do the same for me when I am her age. But there is no guarantee....My former step daughter had her beautiful beloved 20 year old son die of an undiagnosed heart condition...in an instant.
What irritated me most was two previous male partners, with whom I had discussed having a child at age 30 and at age 33, both were opposed to the idea...one so adamantly he seemed to loathe all children. Each of them became fathers at age 50 and then acted like it was the best thing that ever happened. I stopped being friends with both of them (well, the second one we were barely acquaintances by then) because i did not want to hear the painful (to me) details of the glories of parenthood.
What a miserable message I have written...Well, you did say postive or negative!
Flora-- not a miserable message at all. I found your ability to share inspirational, authentic, and important. Your experience helps others see the complexities of pregnancy, miscarriage, and family. Its not a black and white issue or something we can easily sweep under the rug-- in fact it saddens me society teaches us to sweep loss under the rug. I am so sorry for your loss, but rest assured many people in the world care for you and will continue to care for you. You are an incredible woman, whose words and experience, give women like me comfort as we cope with grief. I wish you peace and comfort on your journey...
Post a Comment